Coping with Insecurity - Ki Tisa 5779 - February 22, 2019

This week’s parasha, Ki Tisa, describes the sin of the Golden Calf.

For forty days after Hashem’s revelation at Mount Sinai, b'nei yisrael had been anxiously awaiting Moshe’s return. The Torah says, “and the nation saw that Moshe delayed (boshesh) to come down from the mountain.”

There is a well-known Midrash on this verse.

Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levi said: What is the significance of the Torah using the word boshesh – ‘And the nation saw that Moshe was boshesh, coming late’? Do not read the word as boshesh – coming late – rather – ba’u shesh – six hours of the day came (and went). The Midrash continues: When Moshe ascended to heaven, he told b’nei yisrael that he would return at the end of 40 days at the beginning of the sixth hour. B’nei yisrael thought that the day that he ascended was to be included in the count of 40 days, when in fact, Moshe said 40 complete days. He had ascended on the seventh of Sivan and he intended to return on the seventeenth of Tammuz. On the fortieth day, which was the sixteenth of Tammuz, Satan came and confused the world by showing a picture of darkness and black which conveyed to the world that Moshe had died because the sixth hour had already come and gone. The people became convinced that Moshe had gone up to heaven and died – never to return. The Midrash explains that the people’s assumption that Moshe had died led to the sin of the Golden Calf.

Our Sages wrote Midrashim in order to convey lessons about how we should live our lives and how we should properly serve Hashem. What is the subject of this Midrash? What does it teach us?

The Midrash is attempting to identify what prompted b’nei yisrael to commit the sin of the Golden Calf. What lured this nation who had witnessed Hashem’s miracles in Egypt, at the Red Sea and in the desert and who had experienced the revelation at Mount Sinai into committing this most heinous offense – idolatry? How could this holy people sink to such decrepitude?

The topic of Satan and an explanation of its nature is beyond the scope of this article. However, one conclusion that we can draw from this Midrash is that Satan was an influence on a part of the nation’s psyche over which they were not totally in control. B’nei yisrael was an insecure people. They had a slave mentality left over from their experiences in Egypt. By conjuring up images of darkness and bleakness, Satan influenced the people to believe that their worst fear had come true – Moshe had died and left them leaderless. To assuage their own fears, the people created and then worshiped the Golden Calf.

On one level, the Midrash seems to be conveying a very fatalistic message – there are certain feelings or conclusions over which we have no control. Through mere suggestion, Satan can influence us at any time to feel the most terrifying feelings. This idea leads us to a very disturbing question - if human beings are so impressionable, why was b’nei yisrael held culpable for the sin of the Golden Calf?

Apparently, the Midrash is teaching us that while we do not always have control about how we feel, we are expected to assert control over how we act in the face of that fear. Do we try to deal or do we attempt to twist the truth in order to assuage the fear? This decision – to cope or to distort – is one of the greatest tests in life. B’nei yisrael was held accountable for creating and worshiping the Golden Calf – not for fearing Moshe’s death. Triggers for our deepest fears can be all around us. When confronted with these fears, our challenge is to resist the urge to assuage them with actions that are immoral.