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All Mitzvot Have This in Common - Parashat Vayigash 5779, December 14, 2018


Which mitzvah is greater – Talmud Torah (learning and teaching Torah) or kibbud av v’em (honoring one’s parents)?

Our 
chachamim answer that Talmud Torah is greater and there is an indication of this idea in this week’s parasha

Paroh and Yaakov Avinu discuss Yaakov’s age. Yaakov tells Paroh that he is 130 years old. In reading through the Torah, the math doesn’t seem correct. We know (through some calculations involving Yishmael) that Yaakov was 63 when he received his father Yitzchak’s blessing. The Torah tells us that once Yaakov arrived to Lavan’s house, it was 14 years until Yosef was born. That would make Yaakov 77. Yosef was 30 when he stood before Paroh – at that time Yaakov would be 107. Subsequently, there were seven plentiful years and two years of scarcity. Yaakov would be 116. But Yaakov told Paroh that he was 130 years old! What happened to the missing 14 years?

Our 
chachamim teach us that between leaving his father’s house and arriving to Lavan, Yaakov spent 14 years studying Torah at the Yeshiva of Shem v’Ever. If you include these 14 years, Yaakov was, in fact, 130 years old when he first met Paroh. The key to explaining how we know that Talmud Torah is greater than kibbud av v’em is these missing 14 years.

Based on the Midrash, Rashi explains that for the 36 years that Yaakov was away from his father, he did not once communicate with Yitzchak. Yaakov’s punishment for breaching this honoring of his father is that his own son, Yosef, was sold to Egypt and remained apart from him for 22 years. Why was Yaakov only punished for 22 years and not for the full 36 years during which he failed to honor his father?

The Midrash explains that because he was studying Torah during these 14 years, he was not held responsible for pushing aside the obligation to honor his father. From this we learn that 
Talmud Torah is greater than kibbud av v’em.

On the surface, this comparison is difficult to understand because comparisons require a shared property or aspect. The similarity between an apple and an orange ceases at both being fruit. The parallel between 
Talmud Torah and kibbud av v’em seems to end at both being mitzvot. Doing a mitzvah is an encounter with HaKadosh Baruch Hu. The most basic element of this encounter is the focus on the act itself. Precision in performing a mitzvah is very important. Precision in mitzvah performance promotes thoughtful engagement and thoughts of attention to the will of Hashem. From this perspective, it seems difficult to understand how Talmud Torah is greater than – or even comparable to – kibbud av v’em.

However, there is another aspect to this encounter with Hashem that comes through performing a
mitzvah. In addition to elements of design, each mitzvah has an aim or goal. In order to completely fulfill and be fully impacted by an act of mitzvah, one should attempt to align him or herself with the aim of the mitzvah. By looking into the respective aims of the mitzvot of learning Torah and honoring one’s parents we find a basis to compare them.



Sefer HaChinuch, the 14th century Book of Education, explains that the aim of Talmud Torah is that through studying the Torah, we learn about Hashem’s ways in this world. We study His commandments. We study his actions and systems of hashgacha – Divine Providence. We study Divine justice. Regarding the aim of the mitzvah of kibbud av v’em, the Sefer HaChinuch explains that the ultimate goal of honoring our parents is that through honoring and showing appreciation to our parents, we develop an appreciation for the ultimate source of our existence and an awareness that we ought to serve Him.

Returning to our question – on what basis can we compare 
Talmud Torah to kibbud av v’em? It appears that the comparison relates to the quality of encounter that we are having with Hashem. Talmud Torah and kibbud av v’em reflect two paradigms. Talmud Torah is an encounter with Hashem based on learning about Him. Kibbud av v’em is an encounter with Hashem centered on arousing appreciation for His works and responsibility of serving Him.

Learning Torah and honoring one’s parents are at the foundation of how we orient ourselves as Jews. Each of these two 
mitzvot, by itself, is critical in forming the personality of a ben or bat Torah because each mitzvah represents an opportunity to have an encounter with Hashem. One fully gains from a mitzvah-experience when he or she not only focuses on precisely attending to the rigors of the act of mitzvah but also attempts to be influenced by the root idea of the act of mitzvah. Whether in our performance of the mitzvah of Talmud Torahkibbud av v’em, Shabbat, loving our fellow Jews, tefila or tzedakah, each mitzvah-act is an opportunity to have an encounter with Hashem and to thereby be closer to Him. It is only when faced with a conflict between these two mitzvot that the Torah teaches that Talmud Torah takes priority over kibbud av v’em.

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